Dog Satire

Five Dog Breeds to Avoid

These dogs ought to be illegal to own

John Dean
4 min readDec 17, 2021


Photo by David Shankbone via Wikimedia

Last week I was disgusted to see a woman walking two Chihuahuas. She seemed normal but had engaged in an anti-social act. The Chihuahuas are a menace to everyone but their owner.

The Chihuahua woman was not the only clueless dog owner I saw last week. A man wearing what appeared to be his pajama top was walking a small, black and red dachshund. The nasty little dog barked at each passer-by, showing his teeth. The weiner-dog wagged his tail while barking and lunging to make it worse. The dog enjoyed scaring people.

Photo from

Everyone has a breed they hate

I have a scar on my leg where a pit bull bit me, drawing blood when I was a teenager. I have hated these vicious dogs ever since, but some people consider the pit bull a “loving dog.” If you feel the same way, please visit a psychiatrist.

Photo by Moumen via Wikimedia

My take-aways on pit bulls are to avoid getting close to one and that revulsion or attraction to individual dog breeds is a matter of personal preference. I prefer to avoid mean, drooling, shedding, and smelly dogs lacking bladder control in favor of calm, smart, clean dogs.

In addition to the Chihuahua, dachshund, and pitbull, two other worthless breeds are on my list. But first, a bit more about the Chihuahua. offers these insights:

They are big bite risks for small children, especially if they feel a child is invading their space. This breed can be very moody, not wanting any disturbing or annoying things happening around them. If they aren’t in the mood for kids, they’ll show it by nipping.

My opinion is that Chihuahuas are evil by nature. Naturally, not everyone agrees., amazingly, blames the Chihuahua problem on their owners:

Because they are so small, we pet owners can be very lenient when it comes to allowing the…



John Dean

Writing on politics, photography, nature, the environment, dogs, and, ocasionally, humor. Editor of Dean’s List.